We all have our moments in life and there are life changing events that take place. At times like this, we need people to share these moments with. They are our friends. Only true friends will make these moments meaningful to us.
"No man is in island." We cannot live our lives in isolation. We have got to integrate. we need company, we need a community in order to fulfill our live duties and obligations. These are all facts!. It is also a fact that we have to be in the appropriate company and/ or community.
“Friendship plays an important role in our lives as it moulds our thinking and attitudes. In most cases, it influences our spirituality and moral uprightness which in turn, affects the well being of the society as a whole.”
[Ruqaiyyah Warris Maqsood, Muslim Teenagers Coping with parents, family, the universe and everything, page 66]
Friends can make or mar us and this is why we have to be very careful while choosing our friends.
Your true friend will be there for you no matter what your circumstances, rich, poor, sad, happy etc. A false friend on the other hand will leave you to your predicaments or even put you into trouble. As long as whatever attracted them to you leaves e.g. wealth, fame, beauty etc they also leave. These are known as fair weather friends.
As Muslims, it is important for us to know or choose our friends carefully. In the following verse of the Quran, Allah (swt) told us who to choose as intimate friends.
“O you, who believe, Do not take intimate friends from outside yourselves, who will spare no pains to ruin you, and who loves what harms you.”[Quran 3vs 118]
An intimate friend is someone you share your world with. You open up to them and share you ‘secrets’. You mingle together and come rain or shine; you are in touch with each other.
There is an adage that goes thus;
“Show me your friends and I will tell you who you are”.
The noblest of mankind prophet Mohammad (SAW) was reported to have said;
"The likeness of a righteous friend and an evil friend, is the likeness of a (musk) perfume seller and a blacksmith. As for the perfume seller, he may either bestow something on you, or you may purchase something from him, or you may benefit from his sweet smell. And as for the blacksmith, he may either burn your clothes, or you may be exposed to his awful smell."
[Bukhari and Muslim]
In another hadith, he was also reported to have said:
“ A person is on the path of his intimate friend, so let each of you look carefully at whom he takes as an intimate” [ Hadith of Abu Dawood]
When you move with a certain person or group of people, the probability that you will be influenced by them is very high. And this is why it is also important to study the behaviour and character of who you want to befriend for example, if you choose to befriend a perpetual lair and you are always in his company, in the long run, if you don’t pick up the habit of his or her telling lies, you may grow not to see anything wrong with that habit.
TRUE FRIENDS teach us lessons of Love and life and help us figure out who we are and who we want to BECOME